A report published in January showed that parents of teenagers were either in denial or unaware of what their children watched online. With porn being more accessible than ever, the Guardian journalist Iman Amrani asks men how and why they consume porn and whether they think it has an impact on them and their relationships. Through responses from viewers, conversations with friends, and interviews with the journalist Jon Ronson and the female porn performer Casey Calvert, the latest episode of Modern Masculinity explores how taboos around can porn make life more dangerous both for viewers and performers
Category: Sex
Ne me touche pas… the shift in sex and power sweeping France
Since #MeToo, France’s notoriously liberal attitudes to sex and sexual power are under the microscope as never before
A few years ago I spent the weekend in a château deep in the rural Auvergne region of central France. Even more memorable than the crumbling property with its hectares of forest and decaying outbuildings, were the two elderly men to whom we were introduced when we arrived, who were enjoying an afternoon gin and tonic in the library. One – the father of my friend Guillaume – was Guillaume’s mother’s longtime lover until her recent death. The other was his mother’s husband and the owner of the château where Guillaume grew up. The two men had remained on excellent terms for 40 years.
The setup had all the ingredients of one of those lyrical French films starring Gérard Depardieu, replete with lavish interiors and rhapsodic landscapes looping through the changing seasons. It also ticked every box for lascivious British assumptions about the French, among whom infidelity, at least among the rich, powerful and famous, has long been something of a hallmark of a specifically French insouciance.
The past year or two has seen an incredible liberation for women
‘If you’re going to watch porn, know it’s not real’: meet Britain’s sex-positive influencers
In schools and on YouTube, these taboo-breaking educators are giving young people a helping hand
Despite being a sex blogger with more than 86,000 Instagram followers, Oloni isn’t getting any. “I have to be careful about who I’m sleeping with,” the 29-year-old influencer says with a laugh. “It has to be with someone really low-key. The last person I was having sex with, it went pear-shaped. So I’m avoiding that right now.” But the impact of celebrity status on her sex life doesn’t seem to bother Oloni – real name Dami Olonisakin – too much. “I don’t feel like having sex with anyone at the moment.” She cracks a wide smile. “There’s no one worthy of me sleeping with them!”
We’re sitting in the plant-filled Ilford recording studio in which Olonisakin, Shakira Scott, 31, and Shani Jamilah, 23, record their no-holds-barred sex and relationships podcast, Laid Bare. They eat sweets and catch up about their week – Olonisakin has been unwell, after partying too hard – as they prepare to record. “I definitely want to do the TI thing,” Olonisakin says. (In the week that I visit, US rapper TI made international headlines after revealing that he takes his 18-year-old daughter to doctors for hymen checks, to ensure she is a virgin.) Scott squeals in agreement. She has views on TI.
Sex-positivity prioritises consent and advocates against slut-shaming and sexist double standards
We are the last resort for young people, when their parents and teachers don’t fill the gaps
At a year 10 assembly, we cover healthy relationships, coercive control and how to break up respectfully
‘If you’re going to watch porn, know it’s not real’: meet Britain’s sex-positive influencers
In schools and on YouTube, these taboo-breaking educators are giving young people a helping hand
Despite being a sex blogger with more than 86,000 Instagram followers, Oloni isn’t getting any. “I have to be careful about who I’m sleeping with,” the 29-year-old influencer says with a laugh. “It has to be with someone really low-key. The last person I was having sex with, it went pear-shaped. So I’m avoiding that right now.” But the impact of celebrity status on her sex life doesn’t seem to bother Oloni – real name Dami Olonisakin – too much. “I don’t feel like having sex with anyone at the moment.” She cracks a wide smile. “There’s no one worthy of me sleeping with them!”
We’re sitting in the plant-filled Ilford recording studio in which Olonisakin, Shakira Scott, 31, and Shani Jamilah, 23, record their no-holds-barred sex and relationships podcast, Laid Bare. They eat sweets and catch up about their week – Olonisakin has been unwell, after partying too hard – as they prepare to record. “I definitely want to do the TI thing,” Olonisakin says. (In the week that I visit, US rapper TI made international headlines after revealing that he takes his 18-year-old daughter to doctors for hymen checks, to ensure she is a virgin.) Scott squeals in agreement. She has views on TI.
Sex-positivity prioritises consent and advocates against slut-shaming and sexist double standards
We are the last resort for young people, when their parents and teachers don’t fill the gaps
At a year 10 assembly, we cover healthy relationships, coercive control and how to break up respectfully
‘If you’re going to watch porn, know it’s not real’: meet Britain’s sex-positive influencers
In schools and on YouTube, these taboo-breaking educators are giving young people a helping hand
Despite being a sex blogger with more than 86,000 Instagram followers, Oloni isn’t getting any. “I have to be careful about who I’m sleeping with,” the 29-year-old influencer says with a laugh. “It has to be with someone really low-key. The last person I was having sex with, it went pear-shaped. So I’m avoiding that right now.” But the impact of celebrity status on her sex life doesn’t seem to bother Oloni – real name Dami Olonisakin – too much. “I don’t feel like having sex with anyone at the moment.” She cracks a wide smile. “There’s no one worthy of me sleeping with them!”
We’re sitting in the plant-filled Ilford recording studio in which Olonisakin, Shakira Scott, 31, and Shani Jamilah, 23, record their no-holds-barred sex and relationships podcast, Laid Bare. They eat sweets and catch up about their week – Olonisakin has been unwell, after partying too hard – as they prepare to record. “I definitely want to do the TI thing,” Olonisakin says. (In the week that I visit, US rapper TI made international headlines after revealing that he takes his 18-year-old daughter to doctors for hymen checks, to ensure she is a virgin.) Scott squeals in agreement. She has views on TI.
Sex-positivity prioritises consent and advocates against slut-shaming and sexist double standards
We are the last resort for young people, when their parents and teachers don’t fill the gaps
At a year 10 assembly, we cover healthy relationships, coercive control and how to break up respectfully
We need to talk about women’s bodies – without shame | Fiona Sturges
I’m delighted that, in a slew of cultural projects, discussion of vulvas takes centre stage
Are vulvas having a moment? It’s a ridiculous question, I know, given that more than half of us have them. It’s like asking if bicycles are finally fashionable, or if fingernails are now a thing. But in these supposedly enlightened times, our lady-parts continue to be overlooked, misunderstood, bossed about and violated. Still, it’s been heartening of late to see vulvas (or vaginas, or fannies, or foofs – let each woman decide what she calls what’s in her pants) discussed more openly, shown off in museums and celebrated on television and in books. This isn’t about the vulva-shaped soaps and cushions flooding gift shops, or Gwyneth Paltrow and her daft vaginal eggs. I’m talking about cultural conversations and artefacts that illuminate and educate us all on matters that, by rights, should be common knowledge.
Earlier this year, Channel 4 aired 100 Vaginas, a joyful, taboo-busting documentary in which Laura Dodsworth interviewed 100 women and photographed their vulvas. The series highlighted how little the issues that have most impact on women’s lives, from sexual violence to childbirth, infertility and menopause, are openly discussed. This spring, the pop-up Vagina Museum – the first of its kind in the world – opened in Camden, north London, with the hope of breaking the stigma surrounding women’s bodies and sexuality, and has since launched a crowdfunding campaign in order to secure a permanent home.
